I just made a bafoon of myself. I really wish I could think clearly before I speak. All week I've been getting worried, and then grumpy, at my Lady disapearing again. She suddenly went monday tuesday wednesday and most of thursday without a word. I sent a text each day but felt increasingly pushed away each day I didnt hear from her. By Thursday I was just plain annoyed. It was worrysome and grumpymaking. I felt like she was distinctly ignoring me. It hurt.
But last night she texted me a bit. And we got talking then.
Then tonight she called me before she went to work, and I'm in an off mood. Midway through the call I tried to angle the conversation to asking her to try and call me more, or text me more, just to checkin, keep contact alive. But she responded a bit confused, and it just sounded like I was nagging. I couldnt phrase things well and it all feel apart with silly emotional sounding sentances. I changed the subject quick but it probably sounded naggy. I hate sounding naggy. Im not going to bring it up with her again for a while I think, if I can help it, unless it gets like really bad. I need to sit down and talk about communication needs though, when we visit next. Its going to be important I think.
Tonight I'm going to a birthday party, but now I'm in an off mood and not sure I should go. Hopefully my chicken wings will bring cheer.
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